Hello 2020! Another decade is beginning and it is another opportunity to reflect on the prior year or even decade and set some goals for the year and decade to come. It is actually a pretty exciting question, “What will I accomplish by 2021 or who will I be by 2029? Depending on our age or experience, we may be a bit jaded by this New Year Goal Setting Task as many of us go strong for a couple of days, weeks and then we quickly return to our old habits. So the question is, how do we set realistic goals and stick to them?
The good news is that all goals are realistic. The part that trips us up is our level of commitment to attaining these goals. We often look around and see people that are in better shape than us or that have accomplished something that we would like to accomplish and think they are lucky. The truth is that 99% of the time it isn’t luck that got them there, but hard work and commitment. They have failed, but instead of letting failure defeat them, they got back up with a fighting attitude and went back to battle. When things got hard they kept going!
All goals are realistic, it is your level of commitment that makes a goal realistic
What is it that you want to accomplish or achieve this year or in 3 years or even 10 years? Take the time to really think about how you will feel once you have achieved it? Attach emotion to your goals as this will make it stickier in your brain. Write down what you want and how you will feel. Write down the steps you need to take to achieve these goals and the timeline you need to accomplish each step. If you are really committed to it, put it someplace visible - a place you will see it multiple times a day: on your refrigerator, on your bathroom mirror, in your car. Read it out loud every time you see it. Review the steps daily or weekly and assess how you are doing. You can make changes. Celebrate when you have accomplishments!
Attach emotions to your goals
It will not always be rosey. There will be setbacks, but do not let these throw you off your course and definitely do not let them define you. Don’t dwell on the setbacks. Instead, see them as learning moments. Maybe you learned something that doesn’t work or maybe you failed - missed a deadline or something did not go as planned. It’s ok, you are human. Remind yourself what you have accomplished, get up, reassess, readjust and keep going. It is in these moments of failure that you truly grow. It is in these moments, when you have the opportunity to show yourself what you are truly made of. That is the commitment and grit needed to achieve what is important to you.
In moments of failure… get up, reassess, readjust and keep going
Finally, it is important to be in a good mental state when we are trying to set and achieve goals. A key component in this is to minimize the negativity and replace it with gratitude. Be mindful of the words you use and minimize or better yet get rid of negative thoughts. Whenever you see negativity coming on, look for something to be grateful for. It could be something big or little - a flower, or a kind friend you have or even something you did for someone. Be grateful that you are able to be on this journey to a better you. Be grateful when you succeed and be grateful when you fail. I know we are generally never grateful when we fail, but these are the moments that teach us the most. So look for the gratitude in every moment on your journey. Being grateful releases dopamine and serotonin in our brain which are responsible for making us feel good. When we feel good we are in a better state to make great things happen. Read more about Happiness and gratitude.
Look for the gratitude in every moment on your journey
It can be difficult to embark on these journeys alone. Try to find people who can support you and push you in your journey. Tell people about it who will encourage you and hold you accountable. If you do not have anyone in your friend group or family who will play this role, then look for coaches or online support groups. It is easier than ever these days to find outside support roles. Don’t let others discourage you. It is your goal and sometimes when we change or want to grow the people we have in our lives do not understand. It is ok, they do not have to understand. You are not doing it for them, you are doing it for you!
Look for Coaches to encourage you and keep you accountable
So as you look to 2020 and beyond, know that you are capable of whatever you dream if you are truly committed. Remember ever journey to the top starts with a small step and it takes countless steps, blisters, aches and pains to reach the peak.
Here is a recap:
- Envision what you want to achieve
- Attach emotion to it - how will you feel once you have achieved it?
- Envision the steps you need to take to achieve your goal and how will you feel at each step
- Write down your goals, how you will feel and the steps you need to take
- Post these goals down in visible places
- Celebrate the milestones to get to your goal
- When you fail readjust and keep going
- Find gratitude throughout the journey and throw away negativity
- Find support and coaches to hold you accountable
- Celebrate!
Happy New Year & Cheers to an Amazing 2020!
Cheers & love!
Marisa
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